I'm a little teapot
Suck my dick
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seruant:

ah yes, its almost halloween. 


realterezipyrope:

person: u should like more colours

me: image

(Source: terezipyropeisdead)



resurgance:

the government be like

image

emaciatinq:

boys who moan during sex make it 500% better

(Source: sweatergoblin)

shinymaplesquid:

shinymaplesquid:

I just got a wrong number text from a stranger that said: “hey can we use ur pool there’s a moose in ours”

#welcometocanada

I’ve never received such a funny text in my life I can’t breathe

UPDATE:
I told them “yes if you send a pic” & they sent me tHIS

image

(Source: pancakessexual)

ninjkabat:

Translation:

"He/she’s sleeping"

"wake up"

"let’s wake up"

"heeeeey"

"dinner time"

"dick." *cat wakes up*